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Insignificance

Yesterday was rough.  Really rough.  Condemnation wrapped around my shoulders tightly, willing me to settle in to its false comfort and lullaby of mistruths and pity.  Even now, this morning, words are swimming in my head that I can’t quite reach – let alone piece together into a beautifully woven literary masterpiece that will even slightly sing out to someone else walking along this same broken road.  Because it’s all been written before.  And this life has all been done before.  Nothing is new under the sun.  So why do I keep trying to find something … new?  Something noteworthy?  Something significant that finally breathes “this was all worth it”?

Yesterday the “thank you for your submission, but we are unable to use it at this time” words in my email twisted themselves around to “you are insignificant” by the time they reached my brain.

That’s it.  Settle into it.  You are insignificant.  I am insignificant.

I write the words on the page and lean forward to pick up my coffee mug.  As I do, the morning sun is perfectly positioned within the small space of glass by the door.  It hits my face, surprising me.  And I took pause as I feel the familiar whisper warm the core of my being: I see you.

I breathe deep and settle in.  Bask in the stillness of  truth and being seen by You.  Puffy eyes, mussed hair, chipped nail polish and all.

“I will instruct you … in the way you should go.  I will guide you with My eye.”  (Psalm 32:8)

In order to do that, you need to get your eyes up.  Off of that.  Onto Me.  Lock your eyes with Mine.  Just look up.  We’ll fight this together.

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